ton of bricks

I was sitting eating my lunch (curried chicken salad on mulitgrain) and a man walked into the restaurant. We smiled at each other and then I remembered (and he did too) that we had dated. For like a month. And I had no idea of his name.

I moved to Tucson in August 2001. I started dating D$ in May 2003. That means I had 16 months of other relationships and dates and flings in Tucson. And I can NOT for the life of me remember any one of them (okay ONE, but he was a dick and there was law enforcement involved, yadda yadda).

So my mystery date and I said hello and he called me Jenny (which is a sure sign it wasn't a great month, as no one calls me Jenny) and we caught up for a second. Well, as much as you can catch up with a man you dated AT least 6 years ago for a month and whose name you still can't recall.

But more importantly, this encounter made me recognize how complete things are with D$. There is no regrets about the one who got away, Tucson or life before the move here. No second guessing after the wedding, or before. D$ and I are good...and not that I've doubted that- but by running into a man I dated at least 6 years ago and not remembering a detail about our courtship kind of seals the deal.

Final Chapter or The New Beginning

I just realized I hadn't finished the "hook up" saga!

So we left off at the Hot Tub and my realization that maybe Melisa liked the boy with the cute butt and I had just harmed a friendship with my bestest Tucson buddy.

I got home that afternoon and if memory serves, I called Melisa and told her that the boy had asked me out and I just wanted to make sure that was okay. She laughed at me. Laughed at me! And then she reveiled her master plan: she designed this. SHE invited the boy out so WE would meet. She had known the boy for years and they were friends and that was it...but she knew we would hit it off.

Here is where it gets good. Melisa knew that if I knew or if the boy suspected that we were being matched up, we would resist...so she didn't tell us! And this is why she is a bridesmaid and the one person in Tucson that knows me almost better than I know myself.



It was one of those moments where the puzzle pieces come together and I stepped back and remembered how genius Melisa is!



So on the 21st of this month, Fi and I will celebrate our 5 years together and like usual, we will toast our matchmaker, Melisa.

you didn't know this billion part series was going to turn out to be an ode to friendship, did you! ;)

The HOT tub

Lesson 3

So after agreeing to hang out some more on that fateful night, FI followed me home, I grabbed the skimpiest bikini and he drove me to his house. At the time we lived like 3 blocks from each other, which in Tucson, is awesome, cause everyone is spread out. We lived in this great historic neighborhood with great old houses (with guest houses, which is what I lived in) and wide streets with lots of round-abouts. You know the circles in the street to guide traffic? We hopped in his car and we promptly drive around a round-about and again. He says laughingly "look kids! Big Ben!" I have no idea what he is talking about, but then he quickly realizes I have never seen National Lampoons European Vacation. And I hadn't, but I thought he was weird. But then he explained it was from a movie and he wasn't weird. cool.

So we got to his house and he let me change into my suit in his room, so I closed the door peaked around (no visible weapons or porn, whew) and changed. I grabbed the handle of the door and it doesn't turn. It's not slippery it just doesn't turn. F. I am locked in this dude's bedroom and all I really know about him is he has a cute butt and he is a friend of a friend. F. I tried again and tried to calm down and after what felt like 5 minutes I finally got the door open.

He led me outside to the hot tub and he grabbed a few beers and hopped in. We had a fun night chatting and getting to know each other. We smooched. After what seemed like forever we went inside. We kept talking cause we were having a great time hitting it off. At four am, he drove me home and said he'd like to take me to dinner. I said yes!

I went to bed on cloud 9. The next day I went to Bowl for Kids sake, we had a company team. Although I couldn't bowl (I had just had arm surgery so I couldn't bowl) I went to support my team. I was so giddy, I told a few co-workers that he had asked me out. Uh oh. Two of them looked at me in horror. HE asked YOU out?!? they demanded. My co-workers said that is was possible that Melisa (remember her from lesson one?) liked him. What? My best buddy Melisa? How could I not know? Was I that blinded in my own selfish behavior I didn't see it? Crap. She DID talk about him a lot. Wow, she DID call him and ask him to meet us out for drinks. Shoot. Now that I reflected on it Melisa did mention the boy with the cute butt an awful lot.

I knew what I had to do, I had to call Melisa as soon as I got home to tell her what happened. Then I had to wait for the boy with the cute butt to call and tell him I couldn't go out with him.

Next up: the phone call

Hooking up

Lesson one
Lesson two

The Hook-up. So it is May 13th (see what a girl I am?!) and I go across the border for a fun time with my “enimigo” (sometime friend, sometime boyfriend and sometime enemy). He really wants to spend the night and I really don’t. So we get in the car and drive to the Old Pueblo in the evening. I am driving him home and all I can think about is how my friends and hopefully the boy with the cute butt are at the bar. So I drop of my enimigo (for the last time!) and head to the bar.

I didn’t get there till 10 and I rush in and I see him.

The boy!

I don’t even say hi to my friends, I just run around to the other side of the bar to see him. We are standing there ordering drinks and I tell him about my crazy day across the border and he asks if I am still dating that guy. I say no (confidently and honeslty) and he asks for my number. Classy as always I write it on a bar napkin in pencil (he still has it!). So we have a lovely evening being all moony over each other. At the end of the night we walk outside and kick the dirt and not want to end the night and I ask:
“what are you doing now”
“going to bed”

My friends standing around us kind of chuckle and he realizes that I may want to keep hanging out with him, so I ask again:
“what are you doing now?” a bit more forcefully.
“nothing and I have a hot tub”.

Settled.

Next up: the hot tub!

Backstory round two

Lesson One

A month or so goes by before I hear of the boy with the cute butt again. No big deal. I am still flitting around and having a good time. So sometime in the end of April he must of resurfaced. I remember seeing him a few more times. At a bar here, a bar there, everywhere a bar bar. Then one night in mid-May we have a conversation about sports. I tell him where I went to college and he says “Oh Blank Blankster is your head coach”.

Okay no one ever knows the head coach of MY school. They always get my school confused with the OTHER state school. And like any good state school kid I HATE the OTHER school and I HATE it when people get my school confused with the other school. Like it really matters in the long run, its not like I got my degree from Harvard and everyone thinks I got it from Yale. But it is school pride, you know! I didn't get this tattoo on my lower back for nothing.

So I am sooo impressed he knew the head coach of MY school, I remember sitting up and saying “I love you” to him. That was the first time I thought that I may like to run into boy with the cute butt again.

Next lesson: the “hook-up”

Backstory

Time for a little history lesson, don’t you think?

So it was the Spring of 2003 in March and my dear buddy Melisa tells me that we are all meeting at the bar for another Thursday night get-together. A group of us had been going to the same bar every Thursday night for over a year at this point, so no big deal, right?

Wrong.

Melisa was down right giddy about my meeting her pal who had the cute butt. I should also mention that I was seeing at least one guy at the time (maybe two, the math is still fuzzy). So Thursday finally rolls around. I go to the bar I meet the guy with the cute butt (Melisa is always right about these things) and we play Golden Tee. We met for the first time March of 2003, I remember meeting him and thinking “eh”. He remembers the same thing about me. I thought he was a bit annoyed with me cause I was too busy playing darts and being a social butterfly than standing right next to the Golden Tee machine waiting for my turn. Oh yeah, and the postman I was dating* was there too.

Next lesson: We meet again.
* Dating may be too strong of a term.